We all want to control the process. We all want to share everything we can to facilitate the deal. We want to be involved, we want to be valued, we want to have an impact.

Our needs are messing up our deals. Your desires are irrelevant to the deal. Your validation doesn’t matter. Your ego is unimportant. Once we can accept this, all our deals go smoother.

How does it show up?

• A candidate misbehaves, and you vent to your client.
• A candidate removes themselves from the process for any reason, you blame the candidate.
• You overshare details about the candidate’s perception, thinking it will help your negotiation.
• The client has concerns, and you document them and share them with your candidate.
• You find issues (which may or may not exist) and try to solve them to demonstrate your value.
• You remind clients or candidates of previous written discussions for a CYA.

To generate the most revenue, we need to remove our ego from the process and recognize and accept our role in the placement. You are a facilitator. A negotiator. An advisor.

Your job is to sit in the middle of the process and act as a buffer for both the candidate and the client. When the client says something potentially negative or concerning about the candidate, you absorb the negativity and find a way to spin it to the candidate without decreasing their motivation or momentum.

When a candidate says something negative about your client, your job is to absorb the negativity and find a way to spin it to your client without decreasing their interest in your candidate.

An easy mental hack when communicating with clients or candidates… how can I say what I want to say and do it in only 3 sentences. Everything you communicate should be done in 3 sentences or less. If it takes more than 3 sentences, it’s likely better suited as a live call and not an email. (Status reports being the exception.)