Main character syndrome refers to the tendency for someone to view themselves as the central figure in their environment. They are the hero of their story, even if it comes with more drama than responsibility . People with this mindset often interpret everyday events as particularly meaningful or dramatic, overemphasize their own importance in situations, and may expect others to act as “supporting characters” in their narrative. While it’s often joked about on social media, it can reflect narcissistic tendencies when taken to extremes.

Interviewing often feels like we are taking someone and shoving them into a position of performing for our leading actor casting call. They may feel a need to show how amazing they are, their range, and ability to shine brightly.

The problem is, at least to some extent, the hiring manager considers themselves to be the “Main Character” and the plot is the project or work to be done. Unless they are planning on retiring, they aren’t looking to give up the leading role. They are looking for a strong supporting side character and Academy Awards great players in all categories.

Here’s what that looks like:

First, the person heading into an interview has to frame their successes not as “look how awesome I am” but as “look how I helped us win best picture.” Always be framing strengths in how they helped your past company achieve it’s goals.

Next, they want someone that gets along with the rest of the cast, not a troublemaker or Prima donna. My honest answers for “tell me about a time you had a conflict with a co-worker” include two guys I fired, and an overly touchy older boss. Barraging an interviewer with those might make me seem the problem. Conflict is normal. Pick a situation you resolved in such a way that everyone was happy and lived happily ever after. They are looking for that in their story.

If we quickly volley back interview questions to the asker, they get more time to talk. Like the leading character does in every story. We have often talked about a good interview as a bad date. The more you can keep the other party talking, the more they enjoy it.

You can use this information for help with candidate prep. But I want you to take it a step deeper for a minute. When you are talking to potential new clients, are you trying to be their “Main Character” or are you interviewing to support their cast? So many recruiters go in as heroes, but their prospect’s show isn’t called “Headhunters: Extreme Business Makeover Edition.”

So, are you being a Main Character today, or being hired to expand someone else’s cast?